ramblings... am i in a midlife crisis??

Well folks, again I haven't blogged in forever... Christmas part 1 post..yep there's no part 2. After coming home from vacation and finding 3 cats in your house that had fun messing it up, the Christmas decor went away quickly. So, then I think what else am I gonna post. Everyone has such beautiful pics or crafty ideas or resolutions or some big revelation.

Not me, I am pondering once again what am I here for? I love my blogging friends I have made. The internet has connected me to so many amazing people and I love that. But sometimes it's just one sided. Ya know me commenting on things and never getting anything back but thinking oh we're internet friends! good grief get a grip. I need to get out more and really be with real life friends.

This world is so full of immediate gratification and making you want more all the time. I have always, since I was in junior high, loved the world of interior design. I loved playing in my aunt and uncle's shop. I always dreamed that one day I would have one of my own. Then real life played out and nope, so far, not happening... So, I am a mama to three wonderful kiddos and have an amazing hubby. I was so lucky to stay at home for 10 years and raise my kiddos. Then worked at my sister's daycare where I could bring the kiddos along after school. Now I work in the school and have my summers off. Still not feeling fulfilled.

I find myself pulled more to the posts online of the poor, needy, orphans, brave women, people making a difference!!! For example: Jen Hatmaker posts that want me to dig more into the Word and seek out what God really has in store for me (and has prompted me to call my nearest homeless shelter and take a meal to the family living there) and all the while cracking me up with her humorous stories of real life.  Currently reading her A Modern Girl's Guide to Bible Study. I love Shannan Martin's posts about her adopted kiddos and her moving to an area where most people would want to break out of to be able to give themselves and their kiddos a place to make a difference. I love Kimberly Taylor helping out the kiddos in her mama Barb's Home of Angels in Uganda and the clean water project. I love Paige Knudsen's raw, honest, sweetest posts about her kiddos and her struggles and her triumphs all while keeping it real and lookin' good! ;) Edie has opened my eyes to hospitality and meal planning to make my life easier and not feel like a failure when I get home from work and have nothing to cook, so in goes another pizza... Meal plans are AMAZING! I have loved taking Jeanne Oliver's courses to help me spark my creative side. To know that it still exists! Now I am taking her Create Health Course and can't wait for the changes ahead. I am inspired by Lissa Whitlock whose journey has been amazing and her love for Jesus radiates through her! My first blogging friends Gretchen and Lani who I am so lucky to have met in real life!! Their love for God shines through and they are so very creative and make amazing creations. These are just a few of the amazing women I have met through this remarkable world wide web. There are so many more...

So, then I have to sit and ponder what am I doing that is making a difference? Am I using my full potential to be all that God wants me to be? Is there something more? Is it to come in the future and I am just in the early stages yet? So many questions so little answers. So, I pray and wait and see. I know as we grow, I am gonna be the big 40 this year yikes!!!, our goals change. What do I really want anymore? I have always been drawn to the homeless. I have had an idea for awhile now but I tried to make it happen through my Church and they turned it down. So, then you think well, I guess that wasn't meant to be.. Or was it just not the right timing? We are here for "such a time as this" as the Book of Esther says. This is my time to do something big so people will be blessed. So my kids will live to help others and learn by my example. So that the Light will Shine through me.

I have loved picking up photography and capturing beautiful scenes and have been blessed to be able to help some amazing family members decorate for their wedding days. I have been blessed to be able to travel, which I pray I can do forever!! I have met amazing people from all walks of life. I feel for those who are from broken homes, who need to be loved, who need a second chance, who need their dignity back. So, I may not be posting decorating pics all the time. The blog is named ReInvented Style but I think it may actually have a new meaning. Sometimes we all need a chance to ReInvent ourselves. To make us a better person. To become who we were always meant to be. Stay tuned for what's to come. A new day is dawning...